How to write your own wedding vows

Both of you might have been in a relationship for years before you decided to tie the knot. However only until reading the wedding vows that you declare your love and commitment for each other publicly in front of your friends and family. Not all couples opt to have their own wedding vows, many use the standard vows at the ceremony place. However if you have decided to go this way, the following guidelines will help you with writing your own vows:

Ask for Officiant’s approval

Check with your wedding celebrant before starting to write your vows as some religious ceremony places do not allow own vows. Also, ask your Officiant whether there is any restriction or anything you cannot mention in your vows. Make sure that everything complies with the ceremony venue’s rules before spending hours on creating and fine tuning your wedding vows.

traditional wedding vows

Traditional wedding vow

Start to write your vows early

Start to brainstorm ideas and take notes for your vows early. Writing vows is a task that you do not want to do in the last minutes, with all the hurry. Beginning to write early would give you time to come up with the best ideas and fine tune your words. You would want to feel proud about your vow when you read it aloud in the wedding ceremony.

Write your vows separately first, then go through together

How to get ideas for your wedding vows

  • The best wedding vows should are personal and come from the heart and not from some flowery poems or novel script. Think about what you love about your other significant, you can start with “I love ____ because____”. Think about the first time you met and how your love grew through time.
  • Relax and put aside at least 15 minutes a day to brainstorm your ideas
  • After all the brainstorming, make up a paragraph including all of your ideas. You might have a lot to say about your story, but do not let it go on forever. Try to keep the vow within 6 lines.

Comparing with each other

  • Relax and read out your notes to each other. Writing wedding vows is a team work’s task as obviously you would want them to come out perfectly on your wedding day.
  • Leave the vows aside and don’t look at them for a few days and read them aloud again. If you still like what you were writing, it means that the vow is good to go. If you still feel that something is not right, you can do some final fine tuning.

Format your wedding vows

  • Make the text attractive and echoing your wedding theme
  • Do not make the text too small, it should be easy for you to read during the ceremony
  • Even if you decide to learn the vow by heart, you should still keep a copy close by in case you need it in the ceremony.

You should make at least 2 copies of the wedding vows: one to use during the ceremony and the other you can frame and put in your wedding album as a memory of the wedding and to remind you of the commitment you pleaded to each other.